Why the DSO Rep Was Dressed Like a Bartender

They’ll Smile, Pour You a Drink, and Pick Your Pocket While You Toast

Jul 1, 2025 9:00:00 AM / by Everything DSO

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He looked like the kind of guy who calls everyone “buddy.”

Cool blazer. No tie. Designer watch. Whiskey in hand. And a smile that said, "I'm not here to sell you anything." Except he was.

He was the DSO's closer. The friendliest face of the sharpest contract you'd ever sign. And I watched a very smart dentist—a respected, successful, clinically gifted doctor—get taken for nearly $1.3 million less than he should have received.

All because the guy with the whiskey made him feel like it was just a chat.

If It Feels Too Casual to Be Serious, That’s by Design

This blog is about what DSOs don’t want you to notice. They’ve stopped coming to the table with suits and scripts. Now they come with cool haircuts and startup swagger. They make it feel easy. Relaxed. No-pressure.

"Let’s just grab a drink."

"We love what you’ve built."

"No rush. Just a conversation."

And that’s when you’re most vulnerable. Because while your guard is down, the real negotiations are happening—in silence, in subtext, and in ways most dentists don’t recognize until it's far too late.

Here’s How the Magic Trick Works

You’re approached casually. You’re flattered. You feel seen. You get a “ballpark” offer.

Then they drip information slowly:

  • “Let’s take a look at your numbers.”
  • “We just need a quick EBITDA calc.”
  • “You’ll retain some equity. You’ll still be the boss.”

They make it feel like you’re in control.

But the truth is, once you're in motion with their process, you're operating on their timeline, their valuation method, their language.

And that friendly rep? He knows exactly how to steer you to an LOI (Letter of Intent) that looks generous—but quietly builds in the DSO’s favorite tricks:

  • Inflated post-sale expectations ("earn-outs") that are impossible to hit
  • Handcuff clauses that leave you stuck working under someone else's rules
  • Adjustments to EBITDA that magically shrink your payout
  • Equity retention terms that sound great but have no liquidity strategy

By the time you have questions, the bartender is gone. The lawyer is here. And you’re committed to a deal that doesn’t feel as warm as that whiskey did.

Dentists Don’t Lose Because They’re Dumb

They lose because they’re trusting. Because they’re busy. Because they don’t speak the language of private equity.

And DSOs know that. They build for it. They hire for it.

Which is why you need someone in your corner who has seen behind the curtain.

Don’t Bring Your Clinical Mind to a Financial Knife Fight

You’re not wrong to consider a DSO exit.

In fact, the right DSO deal could be the best decision of your professional life:

  • You cash out at a premium
  • You eliminate the business management headaches
  • You protect your equity and income
  • You work (or retire) on your terms

But none of that happens if you walk into the deal thinking the guy with the cocktail is your friend.

At Everything DSO, we help dentists:

  • Get a clear-eyed, accurate valuation of their practice
  • Avoid emotional language and friendly manipulation
  • Understand every term in the contract before signing
  • Negotiate with leverage and intelligence
  • Exit cleanly, profitably, and without regret

We’ve done it for doctors across the country, in deals totaling over half a billion dollars.

And the best part? Our fee is paid by the DSO. Not by you.

Don’t Be the Doctor Who Said Yes Over Bourbon

You built something incredible. But if you’re not careful, you’ll hand it off for far less than it’s worth.

Not because you were naive. But because they were smooth.

If you’re even thinking about having that conversation with a DSO, talk to us first.

We’ll tell you what the guy in the blazer won’t.

To your unstoppable success,

From your team at Everything DSO

Everything DSO

Written by Everything DSO

 Stan Kinder

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